View Single Post
  #2  
Old 06-23-2005, 05:07 AM
solid11's Avatar
solid11
Discordant
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 266
Default

No what that plug really says is...

STEP RIGHT UP !! We have another blah expansion for you. With more blah zones that you will never see because your still trying to get through Gates of Discord and your too gimp to roll through our new zones anyway.

New Crafting, Spells, Items and More: New items and tradeskill recipes! Also new spells and alternate advancement abilities!

Well yes...you are still trying to craft that blessed coldain prayer shawl and you would like to try crafting from the millions of recipes from the 5 expansions after velious, but you are determined to try out tradeskills from our newest expansion in 1...2...10 years.

And more spells!! Woot. Sure you'll have to delete some from your spell book and they are only renamed older spells with 10 more damage added on.....but wow. You would buy the game for that new spell name alone....right?....

New items? Get outta here....You mean there is even more items? There hasn't been better news since a lottery for toilet paper was released in russia. Ok, I know we are saying there are thousands of new items with every expansion and you have only seen 2% of total items ever released but we need to make filler for our marketing campaign.

And yes more AA's. We thought that with over 850 available AA's now to each class, we want to secure our revenue buy adding 12,435 more AA's to keep you busy. Yes you will probably have to have your great, great, great grandchildren complete your goal of getting them all, but oohhhhh won't you feel good...........in the netherworld that is.......CAUSE YOUR DEAD DUMMY.

And as for the missions we've added. I was required by the CEO to say that anyone can do them regardless of level in order to boost player population and income, and well.....we know you can't get a refund for our game because we lied to you, moving on........

In order to attract new players, we had to come up with some lame ass new feature that we're not even sure works, thus we have the evolving items. Don't email me about this because it was added 3 hours ago and I know about as much as you do how it works.

Thanks again and please buy our new expansion. And you never know, you might even get to see one of the zones before our 123rd expansion comes out in 2007.

Regards,

Eugene Bobtard
(EQ Developer, Programmer, Script Writer, Tray Remover During Lunch Time)
Reply With Quote