Thanks Secrets & Chrsschb
But I thought it over and came to a simple conclusion. I need to host one myself. Clearly, I mean, how far down could this rabbit hole go, right? So I'm building an IRC channel as we speak. My next step when I haz teh funds will be to use a cloud instance to host a Matrix/IRC/Discord bridge.
Yeah. Goals, am I right? I'm a little shy about advertising the channel right now, but for the like, five people that will use it, it'll be a fun thing I think (^.^)
-Cheers everyone, and thanks for the help.