I think the item poof problem has been licked - I have a post with some links that might better help your connection;
http://eqemulator.net/forums/showthread.php?t=23350
Look good at the cable-dsl and speedguide links, they helped me a lot. Your upload speed should be ok for a decent amount of players, just so long as your cable connection stays strong, and you don't catch any "prime time lag" (read the links)