before you compile the server code goto common EQEmuConfig.h and change the server to your current ip address or dot.com etc if you wish replace with real ip address where it says eqemulator.net then use my example above with your real ip address or dot.com
http://www.whatismyip.com/ you can try and put your real ip address in there and see if that works for you first before going throw all that trouble. I understand that you don't want to make it public for everyone , this away you'll be able to tell all your friends your ip address or dot.com to connect to your server only. I understand you and your wife want restricted content do to childern or kids etc playing on your network.