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Connection pooling? EverQuest uses UDP traffic which is fire and forget there is no 'connection'. As far as the database connection pooling that is not the problem here. It is a defect in the server listing and likely manifests in high latency because keep alive packets may be screwing up the flow of data.

Also the best way to avoid this problem right now is to use the public EQEmuLS if you host your own server. If the server is hosted by another admin you might be able to convince them to do a cross integration (very few will probably do that though).