ok the best way to find out what ip to use is well from what i just did nothing i have tryed worked untill i got a well brainstorm. i guess is what i haveta call it
anyways what i decided to do was ask mysql what ip it use's the way you do this is
c:\mysql\bin run file winmysqladmin.exe and then click environment
I know i dont spell well so sew me LOL ok anyways once you do this you will see the ip that mysql use's there local ip addy also make sure you have ODBC installed becuase i also installed that just before i figured it out but i suggest useing the same ip mysql use's well there you go guys hope i helped out