What do you think of these pieces of writing?

[mikejf7]

I would like to know what you think about these pieces of writing, they're not mine, but please give your honest opinion on them.

Writings: http://guildwars.eqemulator.net/writings.html

Thanks.

[Trumpcard]

I'm guessing these are the writings of an 18 year old thats convinced he knows everything... They are very 'self' oriented and you'll see the theme that I'm right, the world is wrong, no one listens even when I try to tell them..

:-)

Theres some really good insight in them however, but once tempered with experience you'll see some true wisdom. Its obvious that he's introspective, he takes the time to actually look at the situation and how he responds to it, and is coming to grips with the realizations that we make when we get into adulthood. That life is not what we thought it would be, the world is a different place from how we perceived it, and the limitations of being a human. Being ruled by complex emotions combined with logic, and uncertainity about the decisions that must be made in the road ahead. He's still not able to take criticism in the right spirit, but it's coming.

Good stuff, I think its obvious that this person has alot of potential, and a noble spirit, at his nature is the desire to do the right things, the right choices, but he's probably still in the youthful self centered stage..

I'd say its not unlike the stuff I wrote when I was 16-20, and coming to grips with my place in the world. Thats one of the most difficult times in a man's life if you ask me. Each emotion is a maelstrom, everything is so much more intense because its all relatively new. Disappointment, love, loss, acceptance. I was so convinced that I was the most brillant man alive, I had a full ride on a physics degree after all, everyone looked to me for guidance, I was the one everyone talked about as 'the smartest person they knew'. Then came the years of going from the small pond to the large one, where you realize though good, you're not the best. It was a tough time as I saw my preconceived notions of the world smashed apart. 'As this world that I've built falls apart at the seams, and I grasp on so tightly to those shattered dreams'

Those are truly the years where the metal of a man's spirit is tempered, and he will make the choice to become the warrior, or a victim of life. There is a vast rift between the types of people in this world, learning to see them, and make the right decision as to what path you'll follow is something that requires careful thought, and attention to the larger picture.

Take every chance you can at self improvement, no matter what it is. Learn, See, Experience, and always take the time to breathe...

The key to having a happy life: Simplicity!

I like them.. He really bares alot in these poems, exposes his deeper emotions, and the complexities that swirl around him. Most people don't take the time to analyze what they think, what they feel, why they feel that way, and where it will eventually lead them. The fact that he does shows that he's on the right track, and he can express them without hestitation.

[quote]Robert Frost (1874

[x-scythe]

damn...long reply...

[Trumpcard]

As opposed to the aholes that voted on the negative end without a bit of criticism or reason behind the decision other than to bash what someone else has obviously put alot of effort into?

[a_Guest03]

I know the online nomme de guerre of this individual, and I'm sure Trump does too. I've also seen his picture years ago, I believe. Call me biased by my previous knowledge of this individual.

I know he's young. I can tell by his observations that he's very intelligent, and that he distances himself from people he could potentially have a friendship with, although not all of them. He likes his time to himself, to reflect on his day, on what people do, and on how his life is changing. He occasionally lets go of himself and graces the people around him with some entertainment, and he enjoys the attention until he's done.

I understand the poetry, and like Trump, I wrote similar stuff. I felt it was very refined and very wise at the time, but I have since looked at it as "something I just did because I was pissed off all the time". I was never an introvert until my parents changed my schools 7 times, and my home 7 times (not always at the same time). It's easy for me to leave it behind, but I think Dominic has been introverted for more of his life.

He's moody and judgmental, and it's disheartening from such an intellect. I agree with him that there's a sadness with knowing the self-destruction of others, as voiced in "Follow the Leader", noticeably named like the Korn album. I think every perceptive man of a certain age writes this poem, if only in his head. I'm of the opinion that it's an inherently wrong idea, and that mankind is a silly thing to begin with. To believe that people, all people, will find or will have found some sort of enlightenment or goodness or common-sense at the exact moment that you notice them is ludicrous. It's expecting more from mankind than it has to offer, and it's misunderstanding the nature of anarchy that runs our lives. Awful things and awful people, and stupid decisions are part of our cycle of life. It doesn't make it wrong to despise the idiocy of the moment in our lives, and the lives of others.

Idiocy is only the failure to be great, and to expect the ideal all the time is to prepare for the failure of mankind.

I'm not sure what troubles him, but he is depressed. He is sensitive, broodish, and unsure of himself among his peers. He feels separated by his intellect, and that his troubles would be misunderstood. He seems to have family problems, unvoiced troubles locked away, and tears he feels that he would like to share, if it were only okay. Repression is a bitch. Call me a wuss, but I would cry myself to sleep sometimes for some of the things that happened to me, that I just couldn't clear from my mind. I didn't feel weak that I had cried, only that I couldn't have prevented the cause of my sorrow.

I think Dominic is unsure of himself, and wants the world to understand him without having to change himself. I don't know him personally, but I think he's a good guy, and I'd tell him so in person if ever I met him. And I've been here:
I hope to find someone like me,
I do not talk of someone to love or a friend,
Just someone who has the morality that I have,
To know that what I am is not taken in vain,
That my existance here has some meaning,
Because if I have no meaning,
I do not wish to exist.

and here:
Emotions
Emotions are something I have held deep within,
I hid myself from the world allowing no one to see what I could be,
Something that may be thought to be impossible to do,
But when my mom tells me she forgot what my smile looks like,
It must be true,
I lived this way for years upon years,
No one knew what was going on inside of me,
I believe I was doing it for my own good.

However, I let go and I stopped hiding,
Now I may feel happiness,
But along with this happiness,
Sadness and anger comes along and consumes me,
I attempt to decide which way was better for me,
But I still stand here, unable to decide.

But as I write this,
Ive become aware of something I never thought of before,
If I become what I once was,
How will I effect the people around me?
Will it have any effect at all?
I feel that false accusations will occur if I change again,
So now must I force myself to live this way?
Not having a decision?
Or will selfishness consume me and I will no longer care.

My poems often matched in meaning and changed in words the feelings expressed here. I agree wholeheartedly with the final stanza quotes here sans the typo "effect the people" (affect). :P

Hey, Dominic. I know you read these. Cheer up. Get some sun. Go get laid. I've been to the dark place you've been, and stayed there for so many years until I confronted what had hurt me for so long. And what nobody could possibly understand for 14 years suddenly didn't control me anymore. It comes and goes, but the anger is gone, and forgiveness and understanding follow. Humans weren't designed to be like the movies. We're enhanced animals, and funny creatures, who just want to be happy. I prefer to look at the world the way I've seen it since I let go of my troubles. It's like a Shakespearean play, with so much goofiness, drama, and joy in it. You just have to sit back. Enjoy the misadventures with a grin, because it doesn't get any better than loving the mistakes that people make, that make people human.

One day, the rain clouds will be there, and you'll be smiling.

About the poems, anyway, they're good. I would say more about them, but I've read and written 100 just like them, and they fare about the same. It's a rite of passage. They're smart, well-written; no real grammar mistakes exist. The flow is nice. Dominic is a smart guy, and these are good poems, appropriate and profound.

[Merth]

I'm not into poetry, so I didn't bother to follow the link when I first saw this post. However, after seeing you guys put so much effort into it, I followed up on it.

I find some of the generalizations on the page somewhat offensive. In particular:

People of this world:
I have one question for you and one alone,
How does it feel to be a puppet?
Everyone around you just as clueless as you are,
A pitiful lemming that will do anything to be accepted.

I am not normally offended by broad generalizations, but this one in particular got to me because we see the author using it to distinguish himself as a better person - yet further on down the page, we see him succumb to the contrary:

I am very cautious in my decisions in life,
I stand up for what I believe and will not deter,
But the unfortunate truth is,
No one really understands who I am,
Nor why I became this way

Why is he so interested in being accepted, yet condemns those that share the interest?

[DeletedUser]

Actually Merth the first poem you quoted was directed towards a certain person I know and I didn't want to directly point it at that person in fear of hurting my friend (Which also read these poems). I don't want to be accepted, just understood for who I am, people think that I will give into things now or eventually (a_Guest03: You tell me to get laid but I find no reason behind it unless its someone I love, this is an example of it as people tell me to get 'laid' and I tell them I would only do it if I loved the person and they say just find some random person after I have said that, I find it rather offensive). Thats just an example but I don't think that was guest's intentions.

Thanks for your comments.

[a_Guest03]

Hey, sex relaxes what ails the mind. I've only been with one woman in my entire life, image, and I'm still with her. I didn't intend to insult your morals. If you must be in love to have sex, then seek love, and have sex later. Most guys I know love the girls they're with, but weren't in love with them before they were with them, if you catch my meaning ;).

A lot of guys are wound so tight, and I find that after they've had sex once in a while, they let go of a lot of tension. Perhaps love is what you need.

[DeletedUser]

If it were only that easy... :P

[a_Guest03]

haha, thus the poetry...

I wrote in sweet words probably 50 poems that a girl I loved would read on a board to which we both posted. She was my sister's best friend, and a firecracker, body and mind. She sported 38D's, if my eyes served me right, and slim as a whip, with a love of history.

What I regret most about the way I treated her isn't that I abused her or that I was mean to her... I never did anything less than gentlemanly near her. My biggest mistake is that I pussed out and never told her in person that I would bend time, or fly, or buy her a rose, just to watch her face. Her crush on me faded before I told her how I felt.

But in poetry, I was a god. She keeps my poems in a folder in her room, with her fianc

[DeletedUser]

Its a more complicated situation that I really wouldn't explain on here, but she knows..

[ibib]

well I voted bad... but that's just 'cause they didn't rhyme... simple things for simple minds I suppose.:lol:


but on the plus side... these "deep" or "smart" things I usually hate so the fact that I didn't like them probably means they were good.

(for instance, unlike the rest of the world (apparently) I liked the movie Ballistic: ecks .vs. sever...)

[Trumpcard]

I liked the movie Ballistic: ecks .vs. sever

Man, you probably are the only one... I figured Lucy Lu in skintights would be enough to save that piece of junk, but I was wrong..