I'm a little unclear on what you're trying to figure out. It sounds like you are trying to find the IP address of an EQEmu server you are connected to. If that's what you are looking for, try netstat -a (Microsoft OS) while you are connected. You'll need some form of EQW functionality.
Unfortunately, I doubt it will show what you are looking for. I'm running a server right now and have people connected, but this is the only established connection shown for EQEmu:
im.a.cyberjunky.net:5999
That's the connection made by world.exe.
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