It's the same problem as you are having with world.exe... the database isn't allowing the username and password combo to connect.
Try restarting everything...
remove databases, locate and delete my.ini, reboot, run winmysqladmin, remake userid and password, run mysql from a command line window (start, programs, accessories, command if you are using old style windows start menu on your XP theme setup, otherwise should be start, all programs, accessories, command) to recreate and re-source database data. Then exit mysql but leave the command window up and at the mysql\bin directory prompt and type "mysql.xex --user=root eq" where eq is the name of your EQEmu database you just created. With mysql running in the command window like that try the GRANT command again.
Maranwe
P.S. You might want to look into using EQAdmin Tool 4.6 rather than 4.0 as well but that won't help with this specific issuel.
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